Tuesday, March 16
My Totally-Legal Entreaty To You: My Clever, Resourceful Audience
1) Fantasy Island, the reboot/remake starring Malcolm McDowell.
2) The Lost Islands - apparently an Australian television series from the 1970s.
3) The Secret Diary of Desmond Pfieffer - a short-lived American sitcom about Abraham Lincoln's black valet.
Anyone know where I might be able to get my hands on these? Shoot me an email and let me know.
With thanks,
M.
Monday, March 15
Where's Sawyer?
Leave your thoughts on what our favorite con artist has been doing in the comments section. The person with the best theory and/or the theory that's closest to the truth will win a to-be-determined prize. Extra points will be awarded for originality and accuracy.
Get yer thinkin' helmets on!
Friday, March 12
Dr. Linus (S6, Ep. 7)

The Back to the Island column for "Dr. Linus" has been forgiven for your reading pleasure on Chud.com. Chud's experiencing some technical difficulties this week, so the page order is screwy. Start on page two (linked here), read page three, then circle back to page one. It's a bit of a pain, I know, but it's out of our control at the moment. Thanks for reading.
Best,
M.
Tuesday, March 9
Lost: Season 6, Episode 7 Discussion
The biggest question I have now, walking away from tonight: Have Jack and the other candidates been made effectively immortal through Jacob's touch? Jack's had appendicits, Sayid was shot and killed, and Sawyer almost died in Season 2. Is it just that they can't die by their own hand? And does this mean that Michael was touched by Jacob at some point as well, given his supernatural inability to die in Season 4?
Favorite moment: the confrontation between Ben and Ilana. "I'll have you" might be one of my favorite lines in the series.
The column for this episode will be up on Thursday afternoon. In the meantime, let me know what you thought!
Follow That Bird
So, join my tiny Twitter army! If Glenn Beck can manage over 200,000 followers (!) then I think I can manage 50. Do it for Lost! Do it for America!
*For the purposes of this post, the author chooses to define "scintillating" as "potentially amusing, but most likely a waste of your time."
Mario Van Peebles Is Lost
"Written by Edward Kitsis & Adam Horowitz and directed by Mario Van Peebles."
Mario Van Whaaaaaaaaaaaaa-?
Surely not THE Mario Van Peebles - one-time possible hot-new-commodity in Hollywood? Director and star of the inimitable "Posse," co-starring Stephen "I punch people in the face for Jesus" Baldwin?

That's the sort of funny/weird/interesting-and-useless information that I enjoy, and I needed to confirm this nugget of bizarre Trivia Gold. Who better to confirm this than one of the actors? And according to Jorge Garcia's "Dispatches from the Island" blog, back in November of 2009 he had the opportunity to work with Van Peebles.
Mario Van Peebles, aka Kane from "Highlander III," is apparently directing tonight's episode of Lost. Which just plain tickles me. You shouldn't worry - Van Peebles has shown himself to be a capable, assured director. But if you're around my age, this news ought to bring a goofy, bewildered smile to your face.
Edited to add: IMDB lists the director of this episode as Bobby Roth. This somehow depresses me. I want some Van Peebles!
Edited to add II: According to this interview, Van Peebles HAS directed an episode of Season 6. Will that episode air tonight? Roth or Van Peebles? One thing is certain: Van Peebles is coming, Kate! He's coming, and you can't stop him!
Monday, March 8
Deftones: Lost, Now Found
I've been a fan of Deftones, a hard-rockin' band from Sacramento, CA, for a long time. Their blend of the aggressive and the atmospheric, of new wave and hardcore, of intelligence and impenetrability, makes them one of the more arresting rock groups around. Deftones' bass player has been in a coma for over a year, and they've subsequently delayed and then cancelled the release of an entire album of material out of respect for their comrade in figurative-arms. This May, they're returning with a (temporary) new bassist, and another album's worth of songs.
That album is titled "Diamond Eyes," and according to the album's track listing, Deftones are fans of Lost. Take a gander at Track 11:
01. Diamond Eyes
02. Royal
03. CMND/CTRL
04. You’ve Seen the Butcher
05. Beauty School
06. Prince
07. Rocket Skates
08. Sextape
09. Risk
10. 976-EVIL
11. This Place Is Death
If you've never heard Deftones before, and you're not naturally, totally averse to the genre of Metal and/or the sound of a man alternately screaming and singing, might I recommend picking up the album "White Pony" and giving it a spin? You'll enjoy it.
(And if you're interested in performing a small but significant act of kindness, you can contribute something to the "One Love For Chi" fund, which has been set up to help pay for the ongoing medical expenses associated with maintaining the Deftones' bassist in a "minimally conscious state.")
-M.
Sunday, March 7
Lost: The Detox (Week 4)
1) Fringe - I've begun watching JJ Abrams' latest television program on the recomendation of a friend, and while it's not nearly the show that Lost is, much of what I love about Lost is present here: the continually-unfurling "mythology," the sense of unfocused, all-inclusive dread, the makeshift family created by the show's main characters. Nothing creeps me out like "body horror," a specific subset of horror devoted to the ways in which our bodies can betray us. Take that, add a healthy dollop of X-Files-esque governmental and corporate paranoia, and you've got the basic world of the show. I'm 2/3's of the way through season 1 on DVD and I'm convinced its the optimal way to absorb it. While the basic procedural aspect of the show is somewhat repetitive (something awful happens to someone in the pre-credits sequence, usually killing a number of bystanders in the process, the Fringe team is brought in, they solve the case, some hints about The Pattern are revealed), that repetition isn't as annoying when you're able to pass straight through a subpar episode to a fantastic one. John Noble's performance as a troubled, formerly-incarcerated genius is reason enough to recommend the show. I never thought I'd see the day where Pacey from Dawson's Creek would act (and act well) in a show I enjoyed, but that day has arrived.
2) Mister B. Gone - I used to be quite a Clive Barker fan. At one point I even had the priviledge of meeting the man, and found him as kind and as welcoming as his early novels are cold and frightening. But Barker hasn't written a novel worth reading in some time, and while I still hold out hope for his legendarily-delayed Scarlet Gospels, Mister B. Gone further suggests that Barker's best days are long behind him. I didn't bother finishing this book, which is rare.
3) Another friend recommended ABC's remake of "V," so I gave the show two episodes worth of time to interest me. Not only did it fail in this simple task, it pulled off the difficult feat of making me feel hate for it. This is a perfect example of how to fuck up a story. First, assume your entire audience is filled with gibbering Gibbons without higher brain functions. Then hit that audience over the head repeatedly with your plot, as if bludgeoning them for having the gall to want to be treated as humans, not Gibbons. Then add a zesty mix of hammy overacting, awful effects, and a haircut that makes the stunning Morena Baccarin look like a ten year old boy with a rare bone disease. I loathed "V," and have subsequently exorcised it's malevolent spectre from my Tivo utilizing a bottle of holy water, a copy of the King James Bible, and a hammer. I cast thee out, "V." Ne'er darken my doorstep again.
Thursday, March 4
Sundown (S6, ep. 6)

The Back to the Island column for "Sundown" has been drowned in a dirty pool for your reading pleasure on Chud.com.
Tuesday, March 2
Lost: Season 6, Episode 6 Discussion
Lost's final season turned an enormous corner tonight, upending the established rhythm of the season with a kind of focused ferocity. From Sayid and Dogen's extended throwdown to the Monster's destruction of the Temple to the alternatively tragic and yet utterly badass story of Sayid's off and on-Island existence to the looks on both Ben and Sayid's faces when they meet by the spring.... Sundown is probably my favorite episode of the season thus far. That was stellar television.
What did you think?